Write it Out - Couples Communication Worksheet

Communication can be any relationships biggest challenge. Learning each others communication style is an important part of getting to know someone.  We're usually attracted to a person because we feel, they "get" us. They understand us without having to say too much or we feel like we can share our thoughts and not be judged for it.

However, there are times when there can be a breakdown in communication..for example during an argument, discussing relationship issues, or making a decision together.  Lets face it, we all communicate differently, especially when we're upset about something or trying to "prove our case". For some of us, we can come up with reasons A, B, and C and even a full PowerPoint presentation as to why our arguments are just. Then there's those of us who can't seem to find the right words to use or who tend to hold back what we truly want to say.

Two people can argue their point of view and never hear what the other person is saying. I've witnessed couples argue over things, not realizing they share the same views on the issue.

A few reasons why this happens:

1. They're not actively listening to each other. They hear each other but that's different from listening and processing the details of the other persons thoughts. 
2. They express themselves differently. What one person can express in a sentence or two the other person needs to use stories and examples.- Different route, same destination. 
3. The actual issue or problem is not clear.  Sometimes you get so caught up in the argument, you forget why you were arguing in the first place.

Verbal communication is NOT your only option. I like to write! (as if you couldn't tell).. As I expressed in my previous posts, I've Been Writing and Stress Overload, I've used writing as a outlet and a way of expressing my most inner thoughts for a long time. For me, sometimes its just wayyy easier than talking.

So, I've created a Couples Communication Worksheet (Click here for FREE printable). The worksheet is to be used as an exercise to help identify a problem, communicate each others argument non-verbally, discuss it, and collectively develop a solution. As you move through the worksheet with your partner, there will be parts where you are just writing, no talking. As you move along there will be points of discussion and time to ask question.

I hope this worksheet becomes a useful tool in helping to figure out communication styles and avoiding (or at least getting through) the breakdowns.

Click the link below to view and print the PDF now! 

In the comment section below,

Don't forget to tell me how you've used or plan to use this exercise with your partner.

Did it help? Would you use it again? Was it a waste of time?

Couples Communication Worksheet Link